Arella Tomlinson

Writing

Platinum Award Winner

Petal

Collage & acrylic on paper mounted on wood - 10 x 10 inches - 2015

Petal

A routine self-screening was slightly askew,

But when I called it in, I wasn’t expecting this.

This.

To be called and told that I have it,

To be called out to join

One in eight American women. I thought,

Can I step back in line and wake up

And this never will have happened?

And this the same day that my baby crawled for the first time.)

Oh, soft petal…

Its spring

Yet I fear that You, precious new (& so close to my heart)

Will be plucked away.

I feel picked

To walk the plank

As if scaffolds of cold steel are rising up around me

Squeezing me onto a grid

Editing Me out

Filtering fleshiness to replace with fear.

It feels like

The Lump

Is in my throat.

If only I could swallow it back down.

Fear 2

Collage & acrylic on paper mounted on wood - 10 x 10inches - 2015

Fear

The surface of my skin appears so still

No ripples, intact.

So how can it be that it will be

Breached

And (if it could be felt) like Some Unspeakable Invasion

And a part of me, the lump, removed?

And do I want them wide (or would I rather keep) all my Margins?

An untenable compromise must be reached,

Myself agreeing, for the first time,

To be utterly powerless

In someone else’s hands

Which may be skilled,

But nevertheless, are holding a knife.

Surrounded by offers of support

And yet I still feel

Like a defenseless creature, even without bones

On an Island.

My own hand (and maybe the Divine?) reaches down

Gentle, cupping

To steady this storm

And it works, partially.

But cleaning and rubbing the preparatory solution on my body,

I still wonder,

Will I see myself on the other side?

This collection of original collage art and poetry, which Arella created in 2014 and 2015, was about finding a breast lump and then undergoing lumpectomy, chemotherapy, and radiation for Breast Cancer, as a mom to a 6-month-old baby. Making these collages and their accompanying poems served as a personal therapeutic process for her. It was a way to sort through the shock, confusion, fear, and to bear the physical discomforts. Making this work helped Arella cope with her illness, while increasing her compassion for others. Her current works are figures on maps.

This collection of original collage art and poetry, which Arella created in 2014 and 2015, was about finding a breast lump and then undergoing lumpectomy, chemotherapy, and radiation for Breast Cancer, as a mom to a 6-month-old baby. Making these collages and their accompanying poems served as a personal therapeutic process for her. It was a way to sort through the shock, confusion, fear, and to bear the physical discomforts. Making this work helped Arella cope with her illness, while increasing her compassion for others. Her current works are figures on maps.

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